Jewelry Man One-Liners (One-Line Edition)

Let EbenGregory tell it, it's better to steal second base than a Nissan Altima. In another exciting boring episode of THE JEWELRY REPORT, the Broad Street Bully finds himself in hot water with Payless Car Rental after renting an Altima and keeping it. Two words: Roc-A-Fella Billionaires?

Let EbenGregory tell it, when a thief kisses you, count your teeth. In another non-boring episode of THE JEWELRY REPORT, Floyd Mayweather takes his first loss after a quick acting robber relieved him of $7 million in exotic jewelry. Want more Jewelry Man? Log on now for 24/7 culture, news and truth...http://www.ebengregory.com

Let EbenGregory tell it, marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out...you lose interest. In another non-exciting episode of THE JEWELRY REPORT, Jay-Z and Beyonce apparently are ready to take their relationship to the next step after applying for a marriage license.

Let EbenGregory tell it, chess can be described as the movement of pieces eating one another. In another dumb episode of THE JEWELRY REPORT, 50 Cent sends Lil Wayne a warning shot after hearing his new old diss song called Louisiana.